She sat by herself doing mundane work as always. Thoughts started to go through her mind, as always. She heard the same whispers echoing through her mind. She has never understood who they are or why they whisper those thoughts to her? “Imagine how therapeutic it will be if you smash this glass on the wall. Or better yet, just make a slight cut on your finger. A little blood and pain will surely be cathartic.
She may not be the happiest person on Earth or the most content, but she is also not that depressed and she has never sought or even had the remote thought of attempting self-harm. So why does she keep having these kinds of thoughts? What do the voices want?
She has always ignored them; casted them off as just a normal bored imagination looking for some action.
But that day felt different; the thoughts were more vivid than usual and she was angry and a little bitter for some unknown reason… suddenly, the voices started to make sense. She felt herself giving in, scheming the perfect execution to make it as messyless as possible.
As a million ideas came rushing through her mind, a part of her couldn’t believe she was planning to do it. It was terrified she was opening Pandora’s Box.
She started to walk towards her room. With every step her mind was fighting with itself; screaming its nerves off. While one part was encouraging her, pushing her forward, the other one was trying to sway her from carrying this through.
She grabbed an old glass container from her room; one she wasn’t using anymore. Then she went to the hallway and picked the perfect spot. She raised her arm. Ready to strike. But she just froze there for almost 5 minutes; arms up, breathing steadily. She was thinking about what she was about to do. She couldn’t figure out why she was doing this and that freaked her out. What possible outcome could she possibly have from this?
She was trying to doubt she was going to follow through, But as she was lowering her arm, she flung it forward and the glass came crashing down. A loud smash. Pieces falling everywhere. Then, silence.
To her surprise, she didn’t feel anything, She just stared at the fallen pieces and left. She went back to her mundane work like nothing had happened, like it was just another day in the park